I would find xenon

You asked me once, what if we'd never met?

I would've felt nothing differently at first.

I was already hollow and tired

compressed into a little square,

the sad frosty breath of an elk

on an empty frozen lake

After a time, without even an idea of you

I would miss you. . . with no knowing

I would only long for something

Life should be funnier and warmer

and more adventurous

Kisses should have fire

and passion. . .

Adventure. . .

I would find xenon

and with it, I'd look. . . 

within the depths of my hollow days

I would look for signs of you

between the formulaic songs

among the endless noise

I pine for the slightest hint of you

in the darkness

of all that does not matter